Judge's comments, 2018 Rumination
Content
The judge will make specific references to one or more of the first four evaluation sections.
Strengths:
Provide strengths, supported with specific references. You have quite a few poems, of which some are rhyming. There are several nonfiction pieces; some are opinion type writings and some are in essay format. Some writing is in the vignette style. The short fiction piece that I thought was the best was the space piece about Luna. There were also a few writings in the letter format. I had to guess on the medium used for the art, so these may be incorrect. There were many colourful acrylics and watercolours. Some visuals appeared to be pen and ink, some possibly markers. I liked the collage and some of the banner type art pieces. There were several photos that were clear.
Recommendations:
Provide recommendations, supported with specific references. One recommendations would be to eliminate some of the images of hands. They became repetitive, and I wasn't sure how they connected to the concept. Also in the writing, there seemed to be too many love poems or vignettes. It is difficult to write about love and be original or too general. I would like to see more types of poems: haiku, sestina, villanelle, narrative, etc. Nonfiction could use some varied forms: interview, review, personal narratives, descriptions of place. Please list the medium used for art either in the table of contents or by the artists' credits.
Total points: 80/100
Mark of Distinction: (none)
Writing and Editing
The judge will make specific references to content including page and issue numbers.
Strengths:
Provide strengths, supported with specific references. (Minimum 350 characters) Many pieces used strong and honest voices: p. 25, 35 ,39 are good examples. I like the thoughtful messages on p. 54 and 24. Many had good imagery: pages 36, 42. There were strong beginnings: page 34 and good endings: 45,28.. Pieces showed good use of verbs: p. 53, 20, and 22. I like seeing the letter format used. This is good for variety. Page 28 used effective prose with parallel structure. Nice play with rhyming words on page 32. Effective diction on pages 18 and 53. Good use with similes on page 47.
Recommendations:
Provide recommendations, supported with specific references. The major recommendation is to proofread your draft closer or get a member of your English faculty to help you. There were too many errors that I listed on your super critique: tense shifts, spelling or typos, spacing. Another recommendation is to avoid writing so much about love or loss of love. These became repetitive. Students need to use topics that they are familiar with or experiences that are detailed. It is difficult to write something new about love. I would like to see some more developed stories and essays. You have many vignettes. For example on page 26, this is a piece that could be developed fully.
Total points: 80/100
Mark of Distinction: (none)
Photography, Art, Graphics
The judge will make specific references to content including page and issue numbers.
Strengths:
Provide strengths, supported with specific references. This is the strength of your magazine. You have many talented artists at your school. I loved the bold use of colour and contrast: pages 13, 40, 44. Colors were excellent on pages 15/1729/53. Art and text work well together: 18-19. Images are distinct page 23. The development of the rose showed clearly on p. 24. The collage was well formatted on page 55. The artists captured the expression well on page 35. The pieces showed creativity and good techniques.
Recommendations:
Provide recommendations, supported with specific references. I could see very few if any thing to recommend to you. This might be a part of content, but the images of hands become repetitive in pieces. I would eliminate some of these. You might want to add some sculpture or ceramics to the magazine. Perhaps, add more photographs to the magazine. Again, please label the medium that that the artist uses either in the table of contents or in the credits. It is helpful in judging content and art.
Total points: 100/100
Mark of Distinction: Mark of Distinction for Photography, Art, Graphics for exemplary work
Please give your reason for awarding a mark of distinction here. Bold use of colors and creative designs.
Design
The judge will make specific references to content including page and issue numbers.
Strengths:
Provide strengths, supported with specific references. There were several clean looking spreads: 14-15/48-49/54-55. Your typography is consistent in titles. The art is well selected for the text. You use spot color well on page 60. Many spreads show good balance: 18-19/28-29. The spread at the end is colourful and fun and looks like a party. Artist and author credits are consistent in placement and size. Spreads have good focal points. The cover is eye-catching with all the colors and continues on the back. Strong use of typography on the cover.
Recommendations:
Provide recommendations, supported with specific references. My main recommendation is to balance your images on spreads more: try not to have all the images at the bottom of the spread: page 22 could be at the top/also page 25, 27, 34-35 have image at the bottom. Avoid busy backgrounds that make reading difficult: page 10. Move text down to the centre on page 16. Words need spacing on page 23. Avoid crowding spreads: 58. Add folio tabs to your spreads and end marks for your prose.
Total points: 80/100
Mark of Distinction: (none)
Concept
The judge will make specific references to content including page and issue numbers.
Strengths:
Provide strengths, supported with specific references. You have a powerful cover with the bright colours. It wraps nicely to the back. Your name stands out in the large typography. The year is also clearly displayed. The title page has the complete school address and information. The table of contents has a strong background of cameras. The editor's note reveals the concept of throw back to the first volume of the magazine. Good tribute to your adviser in the back. Staff statements are helpful in the back. Colophon is informative in the back.
Recommendations:
Provide recommendations, supported with specific references. You need to add folio tabs to your spreads. Keep the typography from the cover as you move to the title page and possibly the table of contents for continuity. Add end marks for your prose; create a graphic image that goes with your concept. I didn't see how the concept of throw back to 25 years ago continued through the magazine. You might want to create dividers, possibly use old covers with quotes from pieces and divide work into sections.
Total points: 85/100
Mark of Distinction: (none)
Student Work
The adviser provided estimates on the percentage of work done completely by students, as well as online and social media content. Please award up to 10 bonus points.
Points: 9 of 10 bonus points possible
Summary
Judge's Summary Comments: I have never judged your magazine, but I have been to Laredo and worked with teachers in the area. You have talented students at your school. I like the concept idea of the 25 year tribute to the magazine. The cover is bright and contemporary. You have many clean and balanced spreads. The main recommendation that I have is to balance the spreads more. Don't put all the images at the bottom of the pages. Also, use your gutters by crossing them with large photos and artwork. The art is the strength of your magazine. The pieces use bold colors and creative designs. I saw no weaknesses in this area. You have matched your art well to compliment the text. My suggestion for content is to avoid so many images of hand. In the writing area, too many subjects were about love and lost love. These became repetitive; it's hard to write about love without sounding cliche. Broaden your subjects. The writing need tone proofread carefully. You have too many mechanical errors. Can your English faculty help you out? Add some longer personal narratives, an interview, review, descriptions of place here. Add some variety of poetic forms: haiku, sestina, villanelle, etc. Add some longer fiction. For a more unified concept, think of a way to organise the content. Sections are the best method with dividers: maybe use past covers for three or four sections. Give these names and try to group the content. I hope my comments will be helpful for your next volume. You do many element of publication well. Keep up the good work. Hats off to Mr. Webber for being such a supportive adviser all these years. Sorry about losing your room. I've experienced that before.
Score:
Content: 80
Writing and Editing: 80
Photography, Art, Graphics: 100
Design: 80
Concept: 85
Student Work: 9
Total Score: 434
Marks of Distinction: Photography, Art, Graphics
Honor Rating: First Class
Judge: Becky Cox
The judge will make specific references to one or more of the first four evaluation sections.
Strengths:
Provide strengths, supported with specific references. You have quite a few poems, of which some are rhyming. There are several nonfiction pieces; some are opinion type writings and some are in essay format. Some writing is in the vignette style. The short fiction piece that I thought was the best was the space piece about Luna. There were also a few writings in the letter format. I had to guess on the medium used for the art, so these may be incorrect. There were many colourful acrylics and watercolours. Some visuals appeared to be pen and ink, some possibly markers. I liked the collage and some of the banner type art pieces. There were several photos that were clear.
Recommendations:
Provide recommendations, supported with specific references. One recommendations would be to eliminate some of the images of hands. They became repetitive, and I wasn't sure how they connected to the concept. Also in the writing, there seemed to be too many love poems or vignettes. It is difficult to write about love and be original or too general. I would like to see more types of poems: haiku, sestina, villanelle, narrative, etc. Nonfiction could use some varied forms: interview, review, personal narratives, descriptions of place. Please list the medium used for art either in the table of contents or by the artists' credits.
Total points: 80/100
Mark of Distinction: (none)
Writing and Editing
The judge will make specific references to content including page and issue numbers.
Strengths:
Provide strengths, supported with specific references. (Minimum 350 characters) Many pieces used strong and honest voices: p. 25, 35 ,39 are good examples. I like the thoughtful messages on p. 54 and 24. Many had good imagery: pages 36, 42. There were strong beginnings: page 34 and good endings: 45,28.. Pieces showed good use of verbs: p. 53, 20, and 22. I like seeing the letter format used. This is good for variety. Page 28 used effective prose with parallel structure. Nice play with rhyming words on page 32. Effective diction on pages 18 and 53. Good use with similes on page 47.
Recommendations:
Provide recommendations, supported with specific references. The major recommendation is to proofread your draft closer or get a member of your English faculty to help you. There were too many errors that I listed on your super critique: tense shifts, spelling or typos, spacing. Another recommendation is to avoid writing so much about love or loss of love. These became repetitive. Students need to use topics that they are familiar with or experiences that are detailed. It is difficult to write something new about love. I would like to see some more developed stories and essays. You have many vignettes. For example on page 26, this is a piece that could be developed fully.
Total points: 80/100
Mark of Distinction: (none)
Photography, Art, Graphics
The judge will make specific references to content including page and issue numbers.
Strengths:
Provide strengths, supported with specific references. This is the strength of your magazine. You have many talented artists at your school. I loved the bold use of colour and contrast: pages 13, 40, 44. Colors were excellent on pages 15/1729/53. Art and text work well together: 18-19. Images are distinct page 23. The development of the rose showed clearly on p. 24. The collage was well formatted on page 55. The artists captured the expression well on page 35. The pieces showed creativity and good techniques.
Recommendations:
Provide recommendations, supported with specific references. I could see very few if any thing to recommend to you. This might be a part of content, but the images of hands become repetitive in pieces. I would eliminate some of these. You might want to add some sculpture or ceramics to the magazine. Perhaps, add more photographs to the magazine. Again, please label the medium that that the artist uses either in the table of contents or in the credits. It is helpful in judging content and art.
Total points: 100/100
Mark of Distinction: Mark of Distinction for Photography, Art, Graphics for exemplary work
Please give your reason for awarding a mark of distinction here. Bold use of colors and creative designs.
Design
The judge will make specific references to content including page and issue numbers.
Strengths:
Provide strengths, supported with specific references. There were several clean looking spreads: 14-15/48-49/54-55. Your typography is consistent in titles. The art is well selected for the text. You use spot color well on page 60. Many spreads show good balance: 18-19/28-29. The spread at the end is colourful and fun and looks like a party. Artist and author credits are consistent in placement and size. Spreads have good focal points. The cover is eye-catching with all the colors and continues on the back. Strong use of typography on the cover.
Recommendations:
Provide recommendations, supported with specific references. My main recommendation is to balance your images on spreads more: try not to have all the images at the bottom of the spread: page 22 could be at the top/also page 25, 27, 34-35 have image at the bottom. Avoid busy backgrounds that make reading difficult: page 10. Move text down to the centre on page 16. Words need spacing on page 23. Avoid crowding spreads: 58. Add folio tabs to your spreads and end marks for your prose.
Total points: 80/100
Mark of Distinction: (none)
Concept
The judge will make specific references to content including page and issue numbers.
Strengths:
Provide strengths, supported with specific references. You have a powerful cover with the bright colours. It wraps nicely to the back. Your name stands out in the large typography. The year is also clearly displayed. The title page has the complete school address and information. The table of contents has a strong background of cameras. The editor's note reveals the concept of throw back to the first volume of the magazine. Good tribute to your adviser in the back. Staff statements are helpful in the back. Colophon is informative in the back.
Recommendations:
Provide recommendations, supported with specific references. You need to add folio tabs to your spreads. Keep the typography from the cover as you move to the title page and possibly the table of contents for continuity. Add end marks for your prose; create a graphic image that goes with your concept. I didn't see how the concept of throw back to 25 years ago continued through the magazine. You might want to create dividers, possibly use old covers with quotes from pieces and divide work into sections.
Total points: 85/100
Mark of Distinction: (none)
Student Work
The adviser provided estimates on the percentage of work done completely by students, as well as online and social media content. Please award up to 10 bonus points.
Points: 9 of 10 bonus points possible
Summary
Judge's Summary Comments: I have never judged your magazine, but I have been to Laredo and worked with teachers in the area. You have talented students at your school. I like the concept idea of the 25 year tribute to the magazine. The cover is bright and contemporary. You have many clean and balanced spreads. The main recommendation that I have is to balance the spreads more. Don't put all the images at the bottom of the pages. Also, use your gutters by crossing them with large photos and artwork. The art is the strength of your magazine. The pieces use bold colors and creative designs. I saw no weaknesses in this area. You have matched your art well to compliment the text. My suggestion for content is to avoid so many images of hand. In the writing area, too many subjects were about love and lost love. These became repetitive; it's hard to write about love without sounding cliche. Broaden your subjects. The writing need tone proofread carefully. You have too many mechanical errors. Can your English faculty help you out? Add some longer personal narratives, an interview, review, descriptions of place here. Add some variety of poetic forms: haiku, sestina, villanelle, etc. Add some longer fiction. For a more unified concept, think of a way to organise the content. Sections are the best method with dividers: maybe use past covers for three or four sections. Give these names and try to group the content. I hope my comments will be helpful for your next volume. You do many element of publication well. Keep up the good work. Hats off to Mr. Webber for being such a supportive adviser all these years. Sorry about losing your room. I've experienced that before.
Score:
Content: 80
Writing and Editing: 80
Photography, Art, Graphics: 100
Design: 80
Concept: 85
Student Work: 9
Total Score: 434
Marks of Distinction: Photography, Art, Graphics
Honor Rating: First Class
Judge: Becky Cox